Back in 2008, when I signed up on Niteflirt, I needed a member name in order to sign up. Minerva Starr was the name I came up with. I was in a hurry and I didn’t really give it much thought and I had no idea at the time how married to the name I would become. I’ve since dropped the Minerva part of the name and Starr is the name I’ve gone by online for years. Minerva Starr has an online identity with a paypal account, her own line of credit and I sometimes get packages with that name sent to my home.
Last year when I started going to classes and munches, I wasn’t sure how I should introduce myself. I knew that people use scene names so I started introducing myself as Starr. That didn’t last long. Once I started going to parties and getting to know people off line, I started using my real name more and more often. I feel more comfortable with it.
Recently, I’ve been talking with someone who I worked for last summer answering phones in a house of domination. He wants to hire me again and I want to work for him but I’m thinking about which name to use. At the time, I used the name Starr but I didn’t like it. There were occasions when I didn’t even answer to it.
I feel like if I’m talking to you face to face in real life I want to use my real name, especially since I have been for months already. People from this site who I already have introduced myself privately to are calling on Niteflirt where I’ve been answering the phone with a different name. The lines between my online identity and real life are merging. I feel like I should use one consistent name.
I know of a few PSOs who use their real first name as well as several Fetlife members who do too. Changing my name online would be a big task and I’m going to start here and now.
(drumroll please)
My real name is Robin. Back a few years ago I had some friends who called me Dirty Little Robin. It makes me smile when I think of that and it still describes me to this day. The more people I tell my name is Robin, the better I feel about it. Psychologically, it feels like I’m affirming my identity. Practically, if I’m going to be working outside the home, I should use a name I answer to quickly.
ETA: This site will probably not exist much longer. I’ll be switching names to a new site soon but in the mean time this is still useful.

















